Not our first rodeo
Treating Ependymoma often starts with surgery, then radiation. There are currently no clinical trials for Ependymoma and chemotherapy is not used. Sheldon and I were happy she wouldn’t be immunocompromised. We were also hopeful that Penn wouldn’t need another craniotomy and could start radiation in late June. When Penn had her fourth MRI, we didn’t expect to hear not only would she have another surgery, but her tumour had already grown back. In just five weeks. A second craniotomy was scheduled in less than seven days.
I knew a second craniotomy meant greater risks. The neurosurgeon will have to be aggressive to ensure as much tumour as possible is removed. Penn’s neurologist will have to go into deeper parts of her brain because the tumour has spread since her May 3rd craniotomy. We should expect deficits after surgery. We won’t know what those deficits will be until she wakes up.
Due to COVID only one parent is permitted to accompany a child at appointments. After reviewing the latest MRI images and hearing the latest news, I just sat and cried, while Penn watched for “Nemo” and “Dory” at the hospital’s fish tank. It broke my heart Penn had to go through this again. And this time, the risks were greater and even scarier. Penn has done so well and who knew what next week would bring.
Penn told everyone that day I cried at the hospital. I told her I was sad because she will have to have another surgery. There is something on her brain that makes her sick and her doctor has to remove it so she feels better. She needs to remember that none of this is her fault, that she is brave and she has strength. Penn flexed her arm muscles for me. Once again, we will have to channel all our positive thoughts and prayers for another successful surgery. This isn’t our first rodeo. And even though we have been through this recently, it’s still hard to manage all your emotions, and all the emotions of the loved ones around you.
The day before Penn’s scheduled surgery, I went for an early morning run to try and clear my head. I ran for seven kilometres. It was around the six kilometre mark that a little voice inside me said, “She will be OK, she will get through this.” It was the first time I smiled in days.